So, it has been quiet some time since I bothered to get back to this. Here I am. Really, I should make time to do more of these since I really have tons of time to waste. I'm stuck here in my house with electronic shackles. It's kind of an interesting experience that I am happy to say could have been so much worse.
It will be a summer of suck. I mean, I like to get out once in a while, but that just won't be an option. On the upside, I've managed to get this house to an almost manageable level of order and am almost ready to get back to cooking shows. That will be a great thing for me, really. I am more than excited about that. And my son. Currently, he's making a board game and explaining the same details every chance he gets. And Spaceballs is playing in the background.
Other things in the works are the comics that seem to be going well. I've managed to keep ahead with DSB and have begun working on a new one about a place filled with boobs. (find that here) And I've been working on the children's book. Illustrations have started to be planned and I'm planning on getting some colors worked out in the next week.
I suppose I should really try to get some of the editing done on the couple of complete books to get them out. My hope is to get the books done and out by fall. As I have little else to do without a job right now, it seems like the best idea.
Okay, well, this was brief... I'm being beckoned to try playing this new game my son made. Okay, out now...
Wednesday, June 18, 2014
Wednesday, October 09, 2013
What the fuck happened to me?
I pride myself on the ability to be knowledgeable... I fucked up... Okay, so long and short of it is, I got popped for DUI... 2nd... okay, Ignorance says it will be cool... but not really... reality states that I have 90 day incarceration... 45 in jail, 45 house arrest... I can't eat or sleep... I feel nausea all the time.
I blame my self. (obviously) My personal depression had me feeling that oddly invincible idea that I could hit the rest button any time... sadly Reset=oblivion... so I am not exactly ready to do that. I am pretty sure that it has directly to do with my wife and children. Personal extinction would be easy but for them.
At this moment, what terrifies me most is that my children will miss me. (there is a trite part of thinking that my wife will leave me or cheat on me in my absence, but I am hoping that in a mature mind that comprehends what has occurred that she will stand by me, as our vows dictated.)
I always preach that you must face the consequences of your actions, and though I am terrified, I will not indulge in my fantasy of escape. I must do what I must do. I have tried to find solace in other accounts of incarceration, but sadly Oscar Wilde is the first to come to mind. Perhaps this will not be such a dramatic end to myself as perhaps an awakening to something new about me. I have often thrived to find new views and meanings into life, and maybe this will be one that I was afraid to try but in force will embrace.
There is a detrimental positivism about my way of thinking that tries to find a positive in every negative... we shall see...
I blame my self. (obviously) My personal depression had me feeling that oddly invincible idea that I could hit the rest button any time... sadly Reset=oblivion... so I am not exactly ready to do that. I am pretty sure that it has directly to do with my wife and children. Personal extinction would be easy but for them.
At this moment, what terrifies me most is that my children will miss me. (there is a trite part of thinking that my wife will leave me or cheat on me in my absence, but I am hoping that in a mature mind that comprehends what has occurred that she will stand by me, as our vows dictated.)
I always preach that you must face the consequences of your actions, and though I am terrified, I will not indulge in my fantasy of escape. I must do what I must do. I have tried to find solace in other accounts of incarceration, but sadly Oscar Wilde is the first to come to mind. Perhaps this will not be such a dramatic end to myself as perhaps an awakening to something new about me. I have often thrived to find new views and meanings into life, and maybe this will be one that I was afraid to try but in force will embrace.
There is a detrimental positivism about my way of thinking that tries to find a positive in every negative... we shall see...
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
this is a distraction
How long do I let this go before writing in this again? How long do I fucking forget about this? And then I feel guilty about not writing here? No, not really. I feel like I should maintain this better, but I probably won't.
Okay, enough about that shit. I have been suffering what I would call a lack of motivation. Is it depression? Who fucking knows.All I know is that I have been starting to revise and edit what will likely be the next book that I will unleash upon the world. Perhaps this will explain why I'm writing here. This is a distraction form a tedious task that I am not always happy when I doing. First off, I have to remain sober, and that fucking sucks. Secondly, I'm looking at the past of my work and seeing that after years of work, I am not making a fucking penny off of my work. I mean, sure I sell books, but if I did the math I think I would find that I make about .0001 cent per hour of work per year of sales compared to work.
Sobriety and tea... really, if I could make a nice living just writing, I would be fine with the work part. I mean, being creative and making the first draft is fun, and the best part. After that, even if some of the book was work to write in the first place, I now have nearly another year's worth of revising and editing before the book is anywhere near ready to be printed.
Okay, distraction over for now...
Okay, enough about that shit. I have been suffering what I would call a lack of motivation. Is it depression? Who fucking knows.All I know is that I have been starting to revise and edit what will likely be the next book that I will unleash upon the world. Perhaps this will explain why I'm writing here. This is a distraction form a tedious task that I am not always happy when I doing. First off, I have to remain sober, and that fucking sucks. Secondly, I'm looking at the past of my work and seeing that after years of work, I am not making a fucking penny off of my work. I mean, sure I sell books, but if I did the math I think I would find that I make about .0001 cent per hour of work per year of sales compared to work.
Sobriety and tea... really, if I could make a nice living just writing, I would be fine with the work part. I mean, being creative and making the first draft is fun, and the best part. After that, even if some of the book was work to write in the first place, I now have nearly another year's worth of revising and editing before the book is anywhere near ready to be printed.
Okay, distraction over for now...
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Why must I keep reading that comic?
Okay, so there is a webcomic that I found, and I keep reading it. First off, the art is not amazing in my opinion, but then any art that is consistent is amazing since I suck at that. Second, the story is all sorts of romantic... not my flavor of much of anything unless it's fucked up. But then, that might be it....
The story is about a young female human/dog hybrid. She is at a new job and meets a guy and they date.
Okay, so are you wondering about the Hybrid part? The story is that some science people made dog-people. After a very brief term of racial issue, they become part of society. I suppose what first interested me in this idea is that I was interested in the idea of social commentary about the new breed of humanoid trying to adjust to bigotry and such. But none of that exists. It is pretty straight forward getting on to the "getting it on."
On top of the fact that I was hoping for a much deeper story, I have to say that for a comic that is based off of the sex thing, the dog/people chicks are boring. They don't have tits that are worth looking at, nor do they have six nipples. So basically, the animal-person looks like an eight year old girl... um, not even sexually appealing.
So why do I keep going back? Am I looking for something in this comic? Nope... pretty sure I'm just fucking twisted and want to see how weird it will get...
The story is about a young female human/dog hybrid. She is at a new job and meets a guy and they date.
Okay, so are you wondering about the Hybrid part? The story is that some science people made dog-people. After a very brief term of racial issue, they become part of society. I suppose what first interested me in this idea is that I was interested in the idea of social commentary about the new breed of humanoid trying to adjust to bigotry and such. But none of that exists. It is pretty straight forward getting on to the "getting it on."
On top of the fact that I was hoping for a much deeper story, I have to say that for a comic that is based off of the sex thing, the dog/people chicks are boring. They don't have tits that are worth looking at, nor do they have six nipples. So basically, the animal-person looks like an eight year old girl... um, not even sexually appealing.
So why do I keep going back? Am I looking for something in this comic? Nope... pretty sure I'm just fucking twisted and want to see how weird it will get...
Tuesday, June 04, 2013
The return of the prodigal...
Funny, but I spelled prodigal correctly the first time and then changed it because I was sure that I had it wrong... but I was correct.
But that is not my reason for posting. It's been a few months since I have bothered to post. It's been a bit of an up and down. Mostly, I was drinking. I would love to say that this drinking was something I was enjoying, but most of what I was drinking was shit and I was just doing it to keep from the sober life. This was causing a lot of problems, as you well imagine. So, as much as I wanted to get work done, I was just making a little bit here and there just to keep my presence known.
I have since been able to break the shakes and now am back to enjoying the drinking, not just the effect. Slowly I am returning to my busy schedule and being productive. But now I am hungry and want a sandwich... I'll keep this updated as things progress...
But that is not my reason for posting. It's been a few months since I have bothered to post. It's been a bit of an up and down. Mostly, I was drinking. I would love to say that this drinking was something I was enjoying, but most of what I was drinking was shit and I was just doing it to keep from the sober life. This was causing a lot of problems, as you well imagine. So, as much as I wanted to get work done, I was just making a little bit here and there just to keep my presence known.
I have since been able to break the shakes and now am back to enjoying the drinking, not just the effect. Slowly I am returning to my busy schedule and being productive. But now I am hungry and want a sandwich... I'll keep this updated as things progress...
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